Fear of a Queer Planet

I was an anti-assimilationist before I even came out of the goddamn closet. You can pretty much call me anything and I'll respond 'Fucking A!'- Tranny. Faggot. Dyke. Homo. Shemale. It's not fucking insulting to me if I'm not ashamed of it and the only thing I'm ashamed of is my country. Just about the only epithet I find hard to swallow is LGBT. Part of it's the writer in me. Any sentence with that motherfucker in it twice becomes a clunky headache to read, let alone to write. But mostly I just despise the branding. LGBT was created as a crass attempt to repackage queer people for the straight world after the Reagan facilitated Aids Holocaust. It's clean. It's neat. It's tidy. It's exclusive. It's hierarchical. It's everything I fled the closet to escape and it's everything that our movement once stood against.

I prefer queer. That beautiful repossessed slur that my people once wore like a badge of honor back when we were too busy with liberation to give a flying fuck about assimilation. Under the banner of queer, we're all equal. There's no pecking order based on what certain hetero-cis-males find most threatening. We're all threatening and we should be. Straight people should fear us. We represent the joyful destruction of all the fascist puritanical bullshit that they find sacred or at least we should. Queer panic is a natural reaction from primates in the company of a radical evolution that, with any luck, will render their species obsolete.

And I'll tell you dearest motherfuckers something else right now, we should be taking recruits. Part of what makes LGBT so asinine is that we keep having to add letters. We've gone from LGBT to LGBTQ to LGBTQA. I'd say we're just under a decade from LGBTQABCDEFGLMNOP. Not that I have a problem with new blood. Quite the contrary. I think everyone should be queer in that being queer should be synonymous with rejecting the gender-sexual status quo.

Sex workers should be considered queer for taking full control of their own biological agency and exercising it however they goddamn please. Society treats these people like lepers while they bust their asses (sometimes literally) doing the hardest and most important job on earth- Getting the rest of us off. Fuck society. Their loss is our gain. If all whores are queer than half of Washington wont be able to get their rocks off until they leash the Prison Industrial Complex and stop bombing other queer people overseas.

Sadomasochists and other members of the fetish community should be considered queer for kicking down their own closet doors and having the bravery to admit that they need more than banal vanilla sex to get their jollies. Everyone's kinky. I like to watch pregnant Asian chicks piss their panties. Sex is a fucking circus of subconscious urges. There is nothing queerer than owning your dirty laundry and wearing it like a goddamn champ. I don't care if you wear a leash or dig choking yourself to bliss in a tutu and scuba goggles. If love is love is love is fuck then it's all beautiful to me. Let your freak flag fly high, furies, whipping girls, adult babies and leathermen. You're all fucking queer as far as I'm concerned. Welcome home weirdos, you're not alone.

Polygamists and polyamorists of all stripes should be considered queer for rejecting the tyranny of the nuclear family. I don't care if you're religious or just have enough love to go around, your families are just as valid as anyone else's and fuck anyone who says otherwise. The straight world likes to crow about focusing on the family. Well what about our families? The ones with two moms, two dads, three moms, five moms and one dad, four moms and four dads or one mom and four dads. Family is wherever you find love and these folks should find nothing but love beneath the rainbow flag with the rest of us malcontents.

And, as far as I'm concerned, all women should be considered queer or at least all the empowered ones. After all, what's more radically unconventional than unfettered female sexuality. The chain-smoking  sluts back at my high school taught me how to be a bitch and they got as much shit as any tranny, dyke or fag for having the gull to be open about their own natural sexual appetites while the jocks could date rape their way to oblivion and get nothing but high fives around the clock for their trouble. They called these girls whores. I called them my friends and I for one would be proud to call them queer. Any bitch who refuses to cloister herself or take some lesser man's shit for simply enjoying to fuck is welcome in my tribe any day of the week.

And that's exactly what we are, a tribe. A stateless nation unto ourselves. We're a colony of freaks and perverts and cunts and misfit toys and we don't wanna be normal. Fuck normal. Normal is just Beaver-Cleaver-speak for fascist and we'll have none of it. We wont mind our manners or shave our legs or keep them shut. We wont seek your goddamn approval because, quite frankly, you haven't earned ours. Enjoy your fucking prison. We broke out and we're only coming back to free your kids. Be afraid, breeders, be very afraid. This is the dawn of a queer planet.



Peace, Love and Empathy- CH



Soundtrack; Songs that influenced this post.

* Little Bird By Annie Lennox
* New For You By Hinds
* Venus In Furs By The Velvet Underground
* My Girls By Animal Collective
* Trash By New York Dolls
* Do I Belong By The Hidden Cameras
* Rebel Rebel By David Bowie
* I Like Fucking By Bikini Kill
* Lunchbox By Marilyn Manson
* Credit In The Straight World By Hole