Monday, October 16, 2017

My Shitlist 2017

Well dearest motherfuckers, it's that time of year again. That time for me to purge another years worth of excess vitriol onto the people who have devoted their lives to making mine just that much more unbearable to cling to. In other words, its tooth for tooth time. It's time for my third annual shitlist. Some of these names will be familiar. Some of them wont. Some have even been here before. But all are more than deserving of a thoroughly ruthless tongue lashing from yours truly. So without further ado, I proudly present you with twelve assholes who won't be missed, this is my shitlist....



Rachel Maddow- Believe it or not, I use to actually find Rachel's style of smug, wonky, propaganda to be somewhat amusing. However ass-backwards her conclusions may have been, at least she got all the names and dates right and provided a unique way of delivering her otherwise predictable Clintonian proverbs to the liberal masses. I was occasionally even tempted to respect her but then came Tuesday, November 6, 2016. The day Rachel's beloved Hillary got her pantsuit wearing ass handed to her by a shaved orange orangutan's asshole named Donald Trump. The day sweet Rachel lost her goddamn mind and any remaining shred of journalistic credibility she once had along with it. Since that fateful evening last Fall Rachel has devoted every square second of her media existence to blaming the results of Trump's election on a vast, ever-expanding, labyrinthine, Russian conspiracy. In the process she has transformed herself from a pillar of neoliberal respectability into a shit-slinging, Russophobic, neo-McCarthyite, tabloid monger.  Naturally the ratings are through the roof but is that really worth the price of dignity? For Rachel, I suppose it is. She's become the blue state answer to Alex Jones. Congrats Rache, you're a successful fucking joke. Maybe Glenn Beck will give a spot on the Blaze once the wheels fall off the Trump gravy train.


Kid Rock- For the better part of the last three decades Robert Richie aka Kid Rock, a spoiled rich kid from the plush burbs of Detroit, has devoted his pathetic existence to passing himself off as poor white trash thus watering down the brand for the rest of us. Think Larry the Cable Guy with abs and an embarrassing hip hop phase. Now this bumpkin poseur wants to represent us in Washington? Sure, fuck it, why not? First Trump, then Rock, by 2024 we'll be electing Foghorn Leghorn. And poor white folks wonder why we don't get more respect. THIS! It's this fucking shit, you twats! Learn to know when you're getting fucking played by the carpetbaggers and maybe the black kids will teach how to pop that gat sideways, provided your aiming it at honky minstrel artists like Mr. Richie. Represent!


Nikki Haley- Ever wonder what it would be like if Shannen Doherty was raised by wild Cheneys? Well, wonder no longer dearest motherfuckers, with Nikki Haley at the U.N. every day is like Heathers with WMD's. The neocon heartthrob (with her share "liberal" fanboys) gives Trump a run for his money in the retard bombast department. Blaming Iran for our Middle East woes, calling for a fresh new Cold War with Putin's Russia and generally breathing fire on the very notions of reason and diplomacy. Those wild Cheneys must be so proud of there pretty little nightmare.


Justin Raimondo- I really, really, really didn't want to put Justin on this list, especially considering that the poor fuck is in the hospital right now. It wasn't so long ago that I put the patron saint of antiwar.com on my first annual list of People Who Don't Suck. But, much like Rachel Maddow, Justin has lost his goddamn mind over Trump. As if it wasn't enough that my former hero ignored all 50,000 of the warning signs to the contrary and endorsed the Orange Fuhrer as the answer to the antiwar movements long unanswered prayers, he also continues to humiliate himself and the rest of us on a near daily bases by repeatedly jumping through his own asshole trying to come up with excuses for every new war crime his blessed man-child commits. He's beginning to sound like the battered bride of a serial rapist, shouting at the cameramen from the courthouse steps, "You just don't know him like I do! Donny wouldn't hurt a fly!!!". Please get well soon Justin, then get a fucking grip before I lose my composure and send you right back to the I.C.U. for injuries related to me getting a grip for you. And if my beloved frenemy drops dead on us before you read this, dearest motherfuckers, I'll do my penance by putting my own bitchy ass at the top of next years shitlist. It ain't easy being a cunt like me but somebodies gotta do it. Hopefully Justin can understand that.


Hillary Clinton- Poor Hillary. She just can't win and it's everyone else's fault but her own. Apparently the entire Rust Belt that I call home is now part of that vast right wing conspiracy that has come to include everyone from Vladimir Putin to Bernie Sanders. Maybe we really are all just one sexist basket of deplorables. I mean, why else do we all hate her so much? It couldn't be all those damn emails or the fancy SOHO cocktail parties with the wolves of Wall Street or her roll as a serial enabler to her hubby Bills rapacious appetites or all those filthy trade deals that swapped whole American cities for access to third world child labor or that little bloodbath of hers in Libya that ended in her publicly cackling over a snuff film or the fact that she has generally devoted her entire adult life to the callous pursuit of unlimited power by any means necessary.... Naaah! It's probably just the vadge. Otherwise, the person most responsible for the election of Little Lord Fuck Pants is Hillary herself. Which would pretty much officially make her the worst person on earth....


John McCain & Lindsey Graham- Neocon Wonder Twins activate! Form of!.... Carcinogenic desert knuckle dragger! Form of!.... Mincing bloodthirsty dandy! Yes, these two trigger happy twats have had quite a time on our watch. Wooing the arms industry. Fellating the Saudis. Ripping the Middle East a few dozen new assholes filled to the rim with dead brown children. Chumming it up with fellow terrorists from Donetsk to Damascus. All while maintaining a steady menage a trios with the "liberal" media. But all gross things must come to an end. Oh well. Might I suggest something along the lines of a Thelma & Louise-style double suicide. Just keep driving, Neocon Wonder Twins, just keep driving. Hand in unlovable hand. Form of!.... Fiery car crash! No survivors.


Wonder Woman- The first fictional person to make this list really shouldn't be on it. A leggy dominatrix dreamed up by a polyamorous psychologist to be a less agro alternative to the violent sausage fest of mainstream comics, Wonder Woman conquered powerful men with love and bullwhips. How could a kinky tranny peacenik like me not be all about that shit? The only problem is that from the very beginning DC Comics has manipulated the character to sell war to women, a demographic statistically averse to such nonsense. From World War 2 propaganda to that thinly veiled blockbuster peon to Clintonian Soft Power that everybody seems to be shitting their collective britches over, A character designed to empower the better angels of the feminine spirit has been reduced to a flying billboard for "humanitarian" aka politically correct mass slaughter. Just like Hillary, she proves that little Susie can smash foreigners faces into glass just like the boys. Somehow, I don't think that's what Simone de Beauvoir had in mind.


Mohammad Bin Salman- All hail Satan! The Crown Prince and heir apparent to that bloody desert terror factory known as the House of Saud. In the span of his 32 years on this wretched planet, Mohammad has done it all and done it all wrong- He's served as his countries youngest Defense Minister, partied on yachts the size of city blocks, stabbed the backs of too many siblings to count, launched body stacking holocausts in Syria and Yemen, sealed Faustian deals with his nations former Zionist enemies and formed the worlds creepiest manage a trios with the Donald's favorite daughter and her Patrick Bateman-esqu husband. Mohammad is the happening psychopath to watch in the Middle East (Bibi is soooo 2015). His wrap sheet reads like a Melrose Place knock-off produced by Wes Craven. The swarthy young prince surfs the devils waves on an ocean of blood and this little cunt is just getting started. Hail Satan, indeed.


Bill Cosby- Some of us on the left have known there is something deeply despicable about the good Doctor Huxtable for some time now. The way he spat on up and coming young black comedians for not minding their manners while the white folks were listening (and he was losing his edge.) The way he gave those same white folks an easy out by blaming the poorer members of his own community for their own subjugation, as if pulling their pants up would have taken the bullets from Trayvon's chest. But none of us were prepared to learn that Ghost Dad was a body count shy of Ted Bundy in the psychopath department. And the worst part is this classist motherfucker got away with it. Go back to your mansion Doctor Hux, here's hoping you choke on your fucking pudding pops.


Barry Manilow- I have no rational reason to add Barry to this list. I mean, sure he fucking sucks but he seems like a nice of enough guy. The reason I put the king of elevator dreck on this list is because over the last few miserable fucking years alone we've lost Lou Reed, Prince, David Bowie, Chris Cornell, Chuck Berry and Tom Petty to name just a handful of the beautiful souls the Reaper has seen fit to tare from our headphones. Heaven has become grossly over populated with artistic genius. It's like fucking Hong Kong for guitar gods up there. All that talent and brilliance, gone, but Barry fucking Manilow lives. Barry fucking Manilow sells out Vegas daily. Barry fucking Manilow plays nonstop in the screaming chambers of nitrous fogged dental drilling galleries 24 motherfucking 7. Fuck Barry Manilow and fuck god too for that matter. If that bitch exists she's got a lot of fucking explaining to do. Yes, doctor, I'll take another Tylenol with Codeine please. In fact, make it a double.


Donald Trump- And why not top off this list of cunts with the day-glow Doofus In Chief himself, a knuckle dragging malignant narcissist who has devoted his entire empty existence to taking the hopes and fears of the downtrodden and converting them into glimmering trash with his name stamped all over it so the IRS will know which tower of crap to repossess. And the Donald's latest steaming tower of crap is none other than these hallowed United States of Hysteria (TM). Speaking exclusively as an unrepentant anti-Amerikan-Tran-archo-bull-dyke (TM), I can't help but to see this hellish marriage as karmic justice. Rome had Nero, Germany had Stalingrad, and the United Plantations of Amerikkka (TM) has Donald J. Trump. But that doesn't make it any less horrendous to watch poor people, both inside this country and out, get raped up the ass by that morally derelict caudillo. Fuck him and the rented elephant he rode in on. With any luck, Putin will be ridding both of them for his Tom of Finland style shirtless propaganda picks by 2020. Nostrovia.


Well that's it, dearest motherfuckers. All the vitriol I can stand to cough up this year. I don't know about you but I feel much better, at least ten pounds lighter. And if I've managed to offend anybody, please let me know. I'm sure I'll enjoy that. Until next time....



Hate, Rage and Apathy- CH



Soundtrack; Twelve theme songs for twelve malignant cunts.

* Rachel Maddow- Flagpole Sitta By Harvey Danger
* Kid Rock- Common People By Pulp
* Nikki Haley- Darling Nikki By Prince
* Justin Raimondo- Stand By Your Man By Tammy Wynette
* Hillary Clinton- It's My Party By Leslie Gore
* John McCain/Lindsey Graham- International Small Arms Traffic Blues By The Mountain Goats
* Wonder Woman- Miss World By Hole
* Mohammad Bin Salman- Sabotage By Beastie Boys
* Bill Cosby- Family Man By Nitzer Ebb
* Barry Manilow- Golden Shower Of Hits By Circle Jerks
* Donald Trump- Beat Down By Mister Heavenly





Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Patriotic Kitsch

About 15 years ago, back when Comrade Hermit was just a lonely, self-absorbed, goth kid at a tiny Central Pennsylvanian Catholic middle school, a president named Bush dropped a shit-ton of bombs on a city called Baghdad for reasons that just didn't add up for yours truly. I had never been particularly political aside from a dedication to the Consistent Life Ethic I had inherited from my devout mother, but watching that beautiful, ancient city get reduced to rubble live on CNN that Sunday night in March, 2003 broke something deep inside of me. It broke my patriotism. It never mended.

The following day I came to school with a peace sign strapped to my right arm and not long after I chose to stop standing for the Pledge of Allegiance. I just couldn't bring myself to salute a flag that flew over the corpses of innocent children like flies. I could no longer muster pride for a nation that condemned terrorism with one hand and committed it with the other.

Needless to say, my minor insurrection didn't rest well with the Vichy jingoists who ran the St. John the Evangelist gulag. I was already on their radar for the high crime of being a sexually confused loner with people problems, this was the straw that broke the camels back. One day I was called into the principals office and accused of everything from Satanic cattle slaughter to planning the next Columbine but what it really all came down to was my treasonous lack of patriotism in those trying times. In their eyes this moral stand against war made a 14 year old kid dangerous enough to the status quo that they felt the need to call the arch diocese to figure out what should be done with me.

All things considered, I got off rather easy. I ended up with a slap on the wrist after they found out I was on anti-depressants. They decided to chock up my civil disobedience to mental illness rather than calling in an exorcist but the damage was done. Word spread of my indiscretions and soon all those fine Christians at the church I grew up in had reduced me and my whole family to leper status, including my devout mother who makes Mother Teresa look like a syphilitic lot lizard. I never trusted another person over thirty again. So much for the 9th Commandment.

A decade and change later, Colin Kaepernick, arguably one of the ten best quarterbacks in the NFL today, is trapped in the veritable Purgatory of free agency because he dared to take a knee during the National Anthem in protest of this countries trigger happy police state. They blame it on the fans in flyover country but the reality is that the One Percenters who own these teams are scared shitless of an inner city black kid with something to say and the brains to back it up. The last thing those Scrooge-y cunts want is another Mohammed Ali on their hands.

Their attempts to silence Kaepernick backfired badly as his stand inspired the better part of the League to take a knee. The spectacle was so great that our Moron In Chief, Donald Trump couldn't help but to pour gasoline on the fire, insulting the players mothers and suggesting they should be fired. It served as a convenient distraction from his smoldering dumpster fire of a presidency, at least until the next mass shooting. But Colin Kaepernick remains unemployed. All because of his principled refusal to genuflect at the alter patriotism. So much for the First Commandment.

I'm not trying to compare myself to Kaepernick. He's clearly payed much more dearly than I did, at least financially, and he runs a far greater risk, as a black man, of getting capped by the pigs than I ever did, as a sullen white teenager, of getting drone striked by neocons (then again....). But the principle remains the same, as does the question- What the hell is wrong with our country? We're talking about pendants and jingles here. Tokens of patriotic kitsch. Is this shit really worth firing talented athletes and traumatizing at-risk teens over? And For what?

Yeah, yeah, I know, "People died for them there flags!" right? Well does that really make it better? As far as I'm concerned that makes it ten times worse. People DIED for that FLAG, literally millions of people, both American soldiers and their victims, died for a fucking rag. A piece of fabric with stars sewn to it that symbolizes undying obedience to a nation founded on the twin pillars of slavery and genocide. These rituals, the Pledge and the Anthem, are designed to sanctify authority the same way the Romans used the cross to justify the crusades and the Germans used the swastika to justify the Third Reich. Patriotism is just a classy word for fascism and fascism always fucking sucks.

So do me and Kap a favor, dearest motherfuckers, burn a flag and take a knee. Lady Liberty could use a good punch in the tits every once in a while.



Peace, Love and Empathy- CH



Soundtrack: Songs that influenced this post.

* B.O.B. By Outkast
* American Girl By Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
* School By Nirvana
* Police Truck By Dead Kennedys
* Policy Of Truth By Depeche Mode
* I'm A African By Dead Prez
* Paper Planes By M.I.A.
* Get Up, Stand Up By Bob Marley & The Wailers
* Rockin' In The Free World By Neil Young
* Minor Threat By Minor Threat

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

The Bright Side Of White Genocide

The white race is under attack! The government and the liberal media are engaged in a conspiracy to ethnically cleanse European Americans through a campaign of miscegenation and mass immigration! If they succeed then white people may be rendered to minority status or, even worse, cease to exist altogether! They call it progress, multiculturalism and anti-racism but what we're really looking at here folks is a white genocide!....

This is the new favorite conspiracy theory of those lovely trolls in the Alt-Right. Most sane people find it to be offensive. I happen to think it's a great idea. I've long stated my belief that race is a lie. A social construct used by pale faced oligarchs to divide the poor against each other and justify their unlimited authority. White is the worst constructed ethnicity of them all, invented to be the bastion of the master class, it permeates every nook and cranny of the American experience like a virus and empowers the most violent impulses of the state and its loyal subjects. The cult of whiteness is a menace that should be crushed. But how?

How do we the people achieve this final solution without drawing a drop of blood? I'll tell you how, dearest motherfuckers, WE FUCK! We open up the borders and we fuck whoever crosses them. White people fuck brown people, brown people fuck black people, black people fuck yellow people, everybody fucks everybody. We all get laid, we start pumping out beautiful caramel colored babies, those babies grow up and fuck other kinds of beautiful caramel colored people and over time notions like "white" and "colored" become totally irrelevant. The only remaining divisions will be gender and class and once Americans liberate themselves from the equally antiquated concept of the gender binary that leaves only class, the true divider, and the real revolution finally begins.

Speaking strictly from a personal standpoint, this Fuck Reich sounds marvelous to me. Not only am I Irish Catholic, the lowest animal on the white totem pole who Thatcher's Ulster Gestapo use to call white niggers, but I'm also a proud race trading rice and bean queen who can rarely get it up for anyone who's not Asian, Latino or somewhere in betweeno. America looks a little sexier with every passing border jumper and I'd love nothing better than to officially detach myself from the WASPs who starved my ancestors off of the Emerald Isle with a face full of Philippina pussy.

So how bout it, dearest motherfuckers? Let's call those Nazi cunt's on their latest bluff and literally fuck the master race to death. I'm feeling horny just thinking about it.



Peace, Love and Empathy- CH



Soundtrack: Sweet jams to fuck away the white race to.

* World Destruction By Time Zone
* Sexual Healing By Marvin Gaye
* Lips That Bite By Downtown Boys
* Brown Sugar By The Rolling Stones
* Jungle Fever By Stevie Wonder
* Rise By Public Image Ltd
* Can't Get Enough Of Your Love, Babe By Barry White
* China Girl By Iggy Pop
* Can I Kick It? By A Tribe Called Quest
* People Of The Sun By Rage Against The Machine
* One Love/People Get Ready By Bob Marley & The Wailers



This post is dedicated in loving memory to Frank Vincent and Harry Dean Stanton. In a nation short on character, no performer shines brighter than a great character actor. Frank and Harry were two of the best. This cinephile salutes you. Godspeed and goddess bless.


Note to dearest motherfuckers; Weather permitting, I'll be headed for the shores of South Jersey next week to clear my noisy head and I just can't achieve the Zen necessary for total relaxation unless I unplug completely. So there may not be a post here for a couple weeks. I know, I know, how will you survive without my forked tongue jabbed into your eardrums? Aside from hard narcotics, which are fabulous, you can always get your truth fix from my friend Tom's blog. He's no Comrade Hermit but he's actually pretty fucking cool in his own right.




Monday, September 11, 2017

Was 9/11 An Inside Job?

Happy 9/11, dearest motherfuckers! Crack out the white wine and punch a Saudi, it's time for America's spookiest holiday (after Columbus Day, of coarse). 9/11 means a lot of special things to a lot of special people. For rednecks it means adding a fifth Blue Lives Matter flag to your gas guzzler. For the vultures in the mass media it means hijacking your hearts with reams of exploitative snuff footage. For neocons it means a free license to murder all the people and human rights that have been on their shitlists since the Nixon years. For Iraq (and Afghanistan and Syria and Libya and....) it means clinging to survival while paying pounds of flesh for a crime they had nothing to do with. For Israel it means sitting back and jerking off while their Yankee golems in the GOP and DNC destroy the only Arab nations standing between them and the final solution to their Palestinian problem. If you're Saudi Arabia it means you quite literally got away with murder. And if you're reading this post in New York it means you lost some good people and probably aren't in the mood for my flippant gallows humor. But I am who I am.

For me, being the paranoid drag queen that I am, it means that million dollar question; Was 9/11 an inside job? I used to think so, now I'm not so sure. I could go on for miles and miles and miles on the why's that make up my post-Truther agnosticism. But I'll save us all some time and cut to the fucking chase; It's just not necessary. I have zero doubt that gutless sociopaths like Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are more than willing to kill a million innocents to get the wars and Orwellian laws they crave. But why bother with drones and missiles and controlled demolition when all you really have to do is look the other way and let the people you've devoted your adult life to pissing on get in a free shot? Hell, it worked for FDR. Why over-complicate things? After half a century of tormenting the Middle East with coup-de-tats, warlords, bombs and genocidal sanctions, the US has no shortage of homicidal motherfuckers looking to get even. All the neocons really needed were a few people in the right places to ignore all the warning signs and tell the security state to stand down.

Everyone had warned the Bush administration that there old buddy Osama Bin Laden was planning another attack on the Twin Towers and I mean everyone. The CIA, Germany, Israel, even the fucking Taliban gave us a heads up for Christ sake. And nobody did anything. Nothing. They didn't close a single airport or even put one on high alert. The only extra fighter jets in the sky that day were confusing NORAD with war games that seemed to mimic the precise kind of attacks that everyone and their cousin had been warning us about. Maybe I'm nuts but this shit smells a lot like Pearl Harbor to me.

Why muck it up with some ridiculous, over convoluted, Alex Jonesian plot? All the motherfuckers had to do was kick back and let it happen....or maybe the government is just incompetent. Not a very sexy theory but it holds up. Our international police state was already stretched so razor thin that even a dozen veritable warnings could have easily gotten lost in the daily flurry of paperwork it takes to maintain an empire. Stranger things have happened.

So was 9/11 an inside job? I honestly don't know. And neither do you. So stop acting so goddamn smug. Conspiracy theorists and "skeptics" share the same problem as fundamentalists and atheists. You're all so fucking sure you've got it all figured out that you leave no room for the possibility of error that defines the human experience. You believe what you want to believe and filter out everything and anything that conflicts with that narrative. So this 9/11 keep a truly open mind for a change and remember that this creepy fucking holiday that America pretends not to celebrate isn't about you and your favorite narrative or mine. It's about a lot of good people who died, both in those towers and the endless wars that followed them. Regardless of who did what, knew what or didn't, those deaths are still in vain as long as we as a country didn't learn to keep our hands to our fucking selves and stop trying to prevent violence with more goddamn violence.

Get a grip, dearest motherfuckers. Crack out the white wine if it softens the blow of existential uncertainty. But don't punch a Saudi. Odds are he's just another motherfucker too.



Peace, Love and Empathy- CH



Soundtrack: Songs that I was into around 9/11.

* I Can See For Miles By The Who
* Dead Leaves And The Dirty Ground By The White Stripes
* Maps By The Yeah Yeah Yeahs
* Beat On The Brat By The Ramones
* Outsmarted By The Hives
* Hard To Explain By The Strokes
* Hash Pipe By Weezer
* Hotel Yorba By The White Stripes
* Jesus, Etc. By Wilco
* (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love, And Understanding By Elvis Costello

Monday, September 4, 2017

Afghanistan As Mental Illness

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Kind of a played out cliche, right? But its true and I should know, I'm fucking nuts. And I'm not talking eccentric, god bless her she's nuts-nuts, but legit nuts. Certifiable. Depression, anxiety, agoraphobia, claustrophobia, gender dysphoria, I got a little bit of everything and have forever but it really blew up in my fucking face after high school when I had my first nervous breakdown. Long story short, I know nuts. I am intimately familiar with nuts (cue Beavis & Butthead) and America's war in Afghanistan is fucking nuts.

Sixteen years, over a trillion dollars, nearly a hundred-thousand dead and what the fuck have we achieved? The Taliban is more powerful than ever. Al-Qaeda has spread to every corner of the known universe and their mutant offspring ISIS are somehow even worse. Afghanistan is a fucking disaster even by American standards. Nobody likes this fucking war. Nobody remembers why we even fucking started it to begin with (Hint; It had something to do with our old friends the Saudis). Even our sadistic man-child president is fucking bored with it. But we're still fucking there. We're still fucking building bridges and blowing them up. We're still arming dope smugglers and child molesters to kill other dope smugglers and child molesters. It's an overflowing bloodbath with a drain clogged with baby teeth and American dog tags. Why the fuck don't we just fucking leave?

I cant help but to think of my own bottomless quagmire, where I spent the better half of my twenties as a bitter shut-in in denial. I spent every day in my house, telling myself, I'll leave tomorrow, No, the next day, No, next week, next month, next year in Jerusalem! But next year never came. There was always some excuse. Some distant goal I was waiting to be achieved for me by unknown forces. Whenever I hear H.R. McMaster or one of Trump's other bullet-headed, desk-chair warriors waxing philosophic about the logic of just one more surge, I can't help but to feel a twinge of deja vu. Just one more year. Just ten thousand more troops. Just a few more wedding party drone strikes. America is no stranger to gross. Gross is what we do. Genocide, nukes, nerve gas, you name it, we've done it. But this war isn't even gross. It was gross ten fucking years ago. Now it's just fucking sad.

Things had to get sad for me before I could leave my house. Real sad. Ian Curtis sad. I had to grieve the loss of the life I lost before I could start a new one. I had to hit rock bottom. Sometimes I wonder when America will hit rock bottom. You would think the Great Recession would have done the trick. Or the election of a reality TV personality to the White House. But no cigar. Every time you think this fucking country has finally hit rock bottom, just when you think shit can't get any worse, it does. So what do you do with a batshit giant that has no rock bottom?

We the people have to become that rock bottom. I had to shake off my complacency and embrace the terror of the outside world to overcome my own madness or at least to get a grip on it. The American people need to do the same because our fearless leaders clearly aren't fucking equipped to face reality. Americans need to leave their own houses and join each other in the chaos of the streets where true democracy thrives. We need to embrace the terror of revolutionary change. That's how we stopped Vietnam. Just scared kids in the fucking streets shouting 'enough!' to the giant. If a motley crew of dope-smokers and flower children can put the scare into this demented old empire then why not us? What have we got to lose at this point but padded shackles and gilded cages?

Trust a basket-case like me when I tell you, dearest motherfuckers, freedom is worth the price of terror. Join me in the streets and shout at the giant. There is no such thing as an agoraphobic democracy.




Peace, Love & Empathy- CH



Soundtrack: Songs that influenced this post (an endless playlist for an endless war)

* Going To Hell By The Brian Jonestown Massacre
* Disarm By The Smashing Pumpkins
* Crazy By Willie Nelson
* Insane In The Brain By Cypress Hill
* Isolation By Joy Division
* Ironic By Alanis Morissette
* Instant Karma By John Lennon
* Young And Insane By The Magnetic Fields
* Lost In My Bedroom By Sky Ferreira
* Grey Cell Green By Ned's Atomic Dustbin
* Paranoid By Black Sabbath
* Schizophrenia By Sonic Youth
* Just By Radiohead
* Can't Stop By Red Hot Chili Peppers
* For What It's Worth By Buffalo Springfield
* At The Bottom Of Everything By Bright Eyes


Tuesday, August 29, 2017

This Is What A Feminist Looks Like?

What is feminism? I hear that question get thrown around a lot. If its online it usually comes with one of two prefab responses. Either it means a philosophy of equal rights for women or its an evil cuckspiracy to deprive hetero white males of they're god given right to date rape, usually constructed by a diabolical coven of communist lesbians. Like most things on the internet, the first one is overly simplistic and the second is childishly over-convoluted. But it is a good question and one I'll return to in a few paragraphs.

An equally good question is what is a feminist? And, for that matter, what isn't? Can a feminist have a cock? Can a feminist be Pro-Life? Can a feminist be a sadomasochist and support the rights of sex workers? Can a feminist reject the very notion of binary gender? And can a feminist despise big government?

My answer to all these questions is, I sure fucking hope so, because I consider myself to be a feminist with all the above provisions.

Though I don't identify as strictly male, I do happen to possess a cock and I don't think I'm going to get rid of it in the near future, though as a genderqueer person the temptation to go full Bobbitt isn't a totally alien concept to me. But you don't have to be a chick to be a feminist. You just have to give a shit about chicks and value them as more than just warm holes waiting to be fucked.

I've always considered myself to be Pro-Life; anti-abortion, anti-death penalty and anti-war. Life is sacred and murder is wrong. With that being said, I don't believe that state intervention in the matter of abortion (or much else) solves a goddamn thing. It just pushes desperate women and girls back to the hangers and only increases the likelihood of everyone involved getting killed which kind of defies the whole point of being Pro-Life in the first place if you ask me. I'm also not particularly fond of the notion of giving the state power over someone else's biology regardless of intent. Some people might even describe my position as Pro-Choice (I don't) but just try to question the sanctimony of partial birth baby scrambling to your garden variety feminist and wait for the claws to come out. Mothers rights matter but so do the rights of the potential women they carry, so I advocate for voluntary non-violent alternatives. Drown me.

On the flip side, I've also always considered myself to be a proud pervert and a devoted member of the BDSM family. I like whips and chains and piss and blood and strap-ons and high heeled boots and a lot of other shit that seems to rile up the Andrea Dworkin set of radical feminists. Vanilla sex just doesn't do it for me, fuck if I know why. You might as well ask me why I like pussy and occasionally wish I had one. It's just the way I'm wired. But what's wrong with that? What's so wrong with pornography and prostitution and giving women the right to use their own goddamn bodies however the fuck they please? What ever happened to 'keep you're laws off my body'? How is the right to rent your pussy out any different than the right to vacuum a pesky little fetus out if it? Aside from the fact that nobody gets killed from engaging in the prior, of coarse.

And last but hardly least, if you're even mildly familiar with this blog, you know I have nothing but disdain for the tired notion of two distinct genders, separate but equal, not to mention the bully state that thrives off of enforcing such divisive and arcane notions. Gender, just like sexuality, is a naturally fluid concept inspired by biology but not defined by it. It's a vast spectrum too broad for two labels or even twenty. That doesn't however mean that femininity, in all its splendid forms, isn't scapegoated, exploited and discriminated against by the very state that the Gloria Steinem's of this world want to save us. What do you think accounts for the fact that the lion share of violence against trans people is directed against transwomen and other femmes? Western Society despises us for embodying the qualities it rejects- familial collectivism, maternal empathy and, above all else, a sense of strength in vulnerability that fosters solidarity with the oppressed. Most of the first whites to join the civil rights movement were women and women were the first breeders to truly embrace the queer liberation movement. You don't have to be an anarchist to be a feminist anymore than you have to have a cunt to be a woman but, in both cases, it doesn't hurt, at least until it bleeds.

So what is feminism? Liberals will tell you it's a ridged partisan science and conservatives will tell you it's a rabid partisan virus. The reality is it's neither. It's a devotion to full spectrum equality by, any means necessary, regardless of race, class, sexuality or genitalia. Along with the acceptance of the bitter fact that we live in a society designed to oppress women of all shapes and forms, be they cis, trans, master, slave, prostitute, john, liberal or even conservative and that this society must be destroyed by OUR hands, OUR hearts and OUR voices. Silence is not an option. Feminism is a righteous racket in a voiceless void. Feminism is a refusal to be ignored.

So is this what a feminist looks like, dearest motherfuckers? You're goddamn right it is and don't you fucking forget it.




Peace, Love and Empathy- CH




Soundtrack: Songs that influenced this post.

* Human Behavior By Bjork
* Rebel Girl By Bikini Kill
* Cherry Bomb By The Runaways
* Your Best American Girl By Mitski
* Suggestion By Fugazi
* Pretend That We're Dead By L7
* Jennifer's Body By Hole
* I Blame Myself By Sky Ferreira
* Rape Me By Nirvana
* These Boots Are Made For Walking By Nancy Sinatra
* Cheerleader By St. Vincent
* By Any Means Necessary By Atari Teenage Riot




Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Fear & Loathing in Charlottesville

Let me start this piece with a brief and sadly necessary news flash- America is a racist country and it always has been. This shit didn't start with Charlottesville and it didn't start with Trump. It started with Christopher Columbus and the ethnic cleansing of Hispaniola and it just got worse from there.

The foundation of this country was built on slavery and genocide (or do I repeat myself). The so called economic miracle of Pax Americana would be impossible without the Great Middle Passage and Manifest Destiny. Our so called Founding Fathers were a pack of white, male, slave-owning aristocrats who only revolted against their limey masters because the latter were attempting to make treaties with bordering Indian tribes in an attempt to diversify their investment in the New World.

As the years turned to decades and the decades turned to centuries, the slave drivers became wardens, the plantations became prisons and the aristocrats became CEO's like our current president. Little has changed but the scenery. Black and brown people are still virtually powerless with the exception of a few token Toms like our last president, who are aloud to dance as long as they let the same old white establishment pick the music and the bastards always pick Thrash.

And then there's Charlottesville, which was only a surprise to the white elite who seem to suffer under the delusion that our history books aren't pure weapons grade propaganda even though they wrote the damn things. As our racist empire begins to descend into the grave its been digging since Columbus with crony capitalism and endless war, the poorer half of our master class are pissed and looking for someone to blame and race-baiting arsonists like Trump and Bannon, as well as their parasitic fan-club in the Alt-Right, are more than willing to fill in the blanks with convenient scapegoats like Muslim refugees and undocumented workers. The sad thing is that these hicks have every right to be pissed. They've been royally fucked by the same crooked system that made assholes like Trump and Bannon rich. They should be crashing their hot-rods into crowds on Wall Street, instead they've been hoodwinked into attacking their own fucking people on main street.

White isn't even a real race. It's a carefully manufactured class hierarchy designed to justify unlimited state power. Many of the swastika waving storm troopers who made up the Unite the Right Rally are the descendants of Italians, Greeks and Irish Catholics, people who weren't even considered white when they first fled to this country as refugees. They had to earn their white privilege by proving themselves just as capable of being as racist and reactionary as the WASP's who spat on them at Ellis Island. As the divide between the rich and the rest of us grows wider and deeper and this country slowly reverts back to the feudal tyranny from which it sprang, the divisions between poor whites and black and brown people become more and more cosmetic. Whiteness is beginning to crack and I for one welcome this schism with the open arms of a life-long class warrior.

The harsh reality that neither side of the Charlottesville fracas seems prepared to grasp is that we're all deplorables, n*ggars and faggots in the eyes of the One Percent. Donald Trump won't save poor white people any more than Obama saved black and brown people. Both of these demagogues serve the same master, a Grand Wizard named Uncle Sam who only feeds his loyal subjects more war and poverty regardless of the color of their skin.

Race in America is a class invention designed to divide the poor against themselves. As long as poor whites and blacks are kept too busy slitting each others throats to realize that there is very little difference between the hood and the trailer park, we will never have the critical mass we need to truly make America great by smashing it to fucking bits.

America is a racist country and it always has been. But it doesn't have to be, dearest motherfuckers, it doesn't have to be. We can break the ties that bind by rejecting the cult of whiteness and joining the oppressed against our shared oppressor. All power to the people.



Peace, Love and Empathy- CH



Soundtrack: Songs That Influenced This Post.

* Cult Of Personality By Living Colour
* Kool Thing By Sonic Youth
* Burning Too By Fugazi
* Walk Like A Panther By Algiers
* White Minority By Black Flag
* The Skin Of My Yellow Country Teeth By Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
* White Riot By The Clash
* The Big Payback By James Brown
* The Underside Of Power By Algiers
* Serve The People By Handsome Furs