Monday, March 19, 2018

Give Peace a Chance

It's pretty rare for me to have good news to report on American foreign policy for this post. So rare that I'm not really sure how to fucking do it. But I have a hard time reporting on the recent advances in the Korean peace process without being cautiously optimistic. Not only are the North and South talking disarmament but our typically petulant Man-Child-in-Chief has pulled a fucking 180 and decided to join them.

That's right, dearest motherfuckers, Mr. Fire-and-Fury has made the unprecedented decision to take his finger off the button and meet with Kim Jong Un, making him the first sitting president to meet with a North Korean leader. Don't get me wrong, the summit has been tentatively scheduled for May and with the Donald's gerbil-like attention span and juvenile impressionability, a peace smashing calamity remains very possible. But with Spring on the horizon and the sonic winds of March blowing the dreary cold of Winter away, I've made my own unprecedented decision to stay positive and give peace a chance.

Unfortunately, the fair weather peaceniks in the mainstream left-wing "Resistance" have chosen a different tact. Rather than applauding when the president finally does something right for a change, they've allowed their partisan tribalism to poison their (half-hearted) zeal for diplomacy and thrown their lot in with the craven war junkies of the neocon jet-set. The common bitch made by these desperate dilettantes is that Trump doesn't know what he's doing, he's in over his head and he has no veteran "expert" Korean diplomats to back him up. And they're right, but I fail to see how that's a bad thing.

America's defunct Korean policy has remained frozen in carbonite since the grey flannel days of the early Fifties, when men were men, women were women, and we leveled the communist North for trying to reunify their peninsula after we sabotaged attempts for a unified Korean election which even Stalin supported. After drowning the peninsula in a tsunami of napalm, the US spent the better part of the next 65 years holding dress rehearsals for round two of the holocaust on the DMZ. The Kim dynasty responded with a decades long quest for a nuclear deterrent. Under the circumstances, I can hardly blame them. The US, in kind, over responded to this response by burying the North alive in crippling sanctions that made the hermit kingdom's already devastating floods and droughts down right genocidal in a despicable attempt to starve and terrorize the nations proud populace into purging the Kims and bowing to American influence.

With the exception of a brief Carter sanctioned reprieve in the 1990's, this has been the policy of our sainted diplomatic "experts", who the limousine liberals and their new neocon friends rotting away in Pelosiville want Trump to seek council with. And with the recent sacking of the shockingly sane Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson, and his replacement with ex-CIA Director and known sociopath, Mike Pompeo, they might just get what they want.

Naturally, Trump's deluded fanclub remains equally delusional, suffering from the almost laughable notion that Trump's childish, Truman with dick jokes, tough talk scared the North into compliance. Quite the contrary. Trump's belligerent and downright deranged attitude towards the peninsula is probably what convinced South Korean president and probable Nobel Peace Prize nominee, Moon Jae-In, to make his own unprecedented decision to bravely defy the wishes of his increasingly unstable American handlers and go it alone in seeking a peaceful resolution with his slightly less unstable northern counterpart, the baby-faced trust-fund despot, Kin Jong Un. I suspect that Trump senses this loss of American influence on the peninsula and has decided that his best bet is to jump into the mix at the last minute and steal the credit to feed his own insatiable ego.

God help me, but I say let him. The only thing consistent about Trump's ADHD-style of global leadership is his colossal ego. The neocons know this and milk it like a dairy farmer. Remember the jumping jacks and cartwheels those cunts did after he bombed Syria? Trump is a malignant man-child who thrives on positive reinforcement. So lets bite the bullet and suck the Orange One's micro-cock for peace. Lets make it abundantly clear that Trump can only be a big boy when he plays nice with others. I know it's fucking gross (not to mention a long-shot) but I'd do worse things for peace, dearest motherfuckers. How about you?

So three cheers for the Ginger Caligula and Korean peace! After all, we can always impeach the son of a bitch after the ink dries.

Peace, Love & Empathy- CH

Soundtrack; songs that influenced this post.

* Give Peace a Chance By John Lennon
* Don't Get Me Wrong By The Pretenders
* Like Dylan In the Movies By Belle & Sebastian
* I Am a Scientist By Guided By Voices
* Mr. Tambourine Man By Bob Dylan
* In Bloom By Nirvana
* Satellite of Love By Lou Reed
* The Boy With the Arab Strap By Belle & Sebastian

1 comment:

  1. Wow! I've totally lost track of this issue due to the problems in my personal life. Thanks for illuminating me.